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How to Talk to a Child About Drugs

Parents want to protect their children from the dangerous things that can hurt them. At some point, however, the child may find themselves in a situation where the parent cannot provide guidance.  The child will also grow into an adolescent and, eventually, an adult who will be responsible for making independent decisions.

While high school still represents a challenging time for young adults, drug and alcohol use may begin in middle school and even elementary school. It is important for parents to equip their children with knowledge of the threat that it poses as well as reasons to say no if they find themselves under pressure.

Below are suggestions for how to talk to a child about drugs and alcohol.

1. Use age-appropriate language and information.
Methamphetamine is a long word for adults, let alone children! You can still convey the gravity of the situation with words and phrases like dangerous and very bad if your facial expression remains stern and serious.

2. Be a good role model.
It is hard to persuade anyone to believe you if you aren’t living by what you preach to others. Children are very perceptive and will notice if their parents behave strangely after drinking large amounts of alcohol. If your behavior isn’t consistent with your words, your child will be confused and you will invalidate your efforts. Develop a clear position on drugs and alcohol and stick to it, especially in the child’s presence.

3. Role-play potential situations.
Many children learn by doing. Role-playing potential situations in which they may find themselves – a friend offering them a substance, finding prescription medicines at a neighbor’s house – will give them a concrete memory of how to respond in each situation. Being active in a type of play will also hold their attention longer than being forced to listen to a serious topic.

4. Listen and let the child ask questions.
A conversation – which means that both people participate – is often more effective than simply talking at the child. Make sure you give them space to voice their questions and concerns.

5. Reaffirm them.
Children need to be reminded of their value. They also want praise for their efforts. By reaffirming them, you give them another reason to say no when confronted. They do not need a substance to feel better about themselves: they are loved.

6. Give them skills for choosing friendships wisely.
In the same way that children want affirmation from their parents, they also want to have the approval of their peers. Ask your child “what makes a good friend?” When the child has answered, ask “what makes a bad friend?” If necessary, ask more leading questions that can help them realize that people who offer substances that can harm them do not have their best interest in mind.

7. Be appropriately honest.
You certainly should not tell a child everything about drugs if they are not developmentally ready for it. However, if a child has never been told that “drugs make you feel good for a little while”, they may be surprised when they hear it from a peer and wonder why you lied to them. It can be helpful to anticipate the arguments that someone else might make to persuade your child, and teach them to expect those arguments.